Instant Inspiration…

Posted on February 10, 2026 by jamilah

“The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference.”

While he did not invent the quote; it is predominately attributed to Elie Wiesel, the Nobel Peace Prize-winning author of Night, a account of his experiences at Auschwitz and Buchenwald, during the Nazis’ regime.

The most fascinating thing about the quote being famously attributed to Wiesel is that he was also well known to be a supporter of Israel and its Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. For Wiesel (who left this earth in 2016), his interpretation of ‘indifference’ is sorely lacking in intersectionality; because anyone who is a supporter of Israel- whether ardent or liberal- is practicing indifference to the long-held genocide of Palestinian people.

While it is crucial to value the stories of survivors of particular pogroms within the last century; we should just as strongly critique their contradictions and silence (or cavalier attitudes) when it comes to ongoing pogroms (especially when it is done in their name).

i’ve seen similar modes of indifference and resignation, when it comes to violence upon marginalized and historically (and presently) oppressed groups of people. It’s not until certain events affect someone personally, before they make the connections.

“And you find that what was over there is over here…”

This is not to say that people only catching on now are bad people- that is too simplistic/myopic of an argument, though it is one that would immediately be focused on. The larger factor is that we are conditioned to individualize struggle (or suffering in particular), and to see it as a ‘moral failing’, as opposed to a systemic one.
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i have spoken about my ‘love/hate’ relationship with pop music here in the past.

Pop(ular) music’s purpose in general is set up (by an industry invested in profits) to be a vehicle for escapism. However, there are always going to be artists to belie that objective. Georgios Kyriacos Panayiotou was one of those artists.

Wham! was among a select number of British pop groups/artists that were well known in pop circles, but also crossed over into the hood: The Police, Thompson Twins, Robert Palmer, Culture Club, Tears For Fears, Human league, David Bowie and Level 42, among others.

Whether it was the jazz scales, the nods to dub or the Jam and Lewis production, there was something which resonated for many. It was certainly something deeper than what the industry demanded- which musicians such as Terry Bozzio (who originally came out of the Zappa universe before forming Missing Persons) learned the hard way.

After WHAM! (his project with Andrew Ridgeley) disbanded in 1986, George Michael soon gave birth to his solo artistic journey with 1987’s Faith. Despite the album’s success, the centerpiece of the conversation was still his looks. Like many an artist before (and after) him, he aimed to be seen as an authentic artist, as opposed to a ‘pop star’…. hence, his rebirth.

Listen Without Prejudice (Vol. 1), as well as all subsequent albums, became even deeper treatises on interpersonal relations, death/loss, imperialism/war, class inequities and superficiality. He’s even utilized satire and dark humor at his own expense at times.

i personally like some of WHAM!’s music, and i think Faith is a decent collection of well-written songs. But it was Listen Without Prejudice (one of the greatest album titles in the whole world) that made me actually pay attention to what an incredible artist Mr. Panayiotou actually was (is). It’s songs such as ‘Mother’s Pride’ which certainly led him to becoming one of my favorite lyric writers of all time, and i have no problem putting him on a list of favorite vocalists as well.

‘Praying For Time’ (released in August of 1990) was the first single released from the album. i was about to turn 14 years old. i was already a burgeoning angry punk kid by this point, but i still loved a well-written song, regardless of where it came from.

And while Listen Without Prejudice got me to initially pay more attention, it was the anti- Tony Blair/George Bush/Iraq war jam ‘Shoot the Dog’ (initially released as a single, then on his final album (of original songs), 2004’s Patience) which sealed it for me. When i first heard it, i felt it was akin to a Ministry song, with its Twitch-era vocal similarities, the Human League sample, as well as the satirical jabs at Bush. There was also a dig at funds being allocated for imperialism, as opposed to necessary community services.

Nine nine nine gettin’ jiggy
People did you see that fire in the city?
It’s like we’re fresh out of democratic
Gotta get yourself a little something semi-automatic yeah

Mustapha
Mazel Tov
The Gaza Boys
All that holy stuff
I got the feelin’ when it all goes off
They’re gonna shoot the dog

The Ayatollah’s gettin’ bombed yeah
See Sergeant Bilko having fun again
Good puppy, good puppy
Rollin’ on over for The Man

Cherie baby, spliff up
I wanna kick back mama
And watch the World Cup with ya baby
Yeah, that’s right!
We’re getting freaky tonight
Stay with me tonight
Let’s have some fun while Tony’s stateside
It’s gonna be alright
It’s gonna be alright
See Tony dancing with Dubya
Don’t you wanna know why?
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‘Praying for Time”s text-only video was reminiscent of ‘Sign ‘O The Times’, the title track from an album released in 1987 by Prince, an artist who considered his music’s messages to be just as important as the visuals.

Hurricane Annie ripped the ceiling off a church and killed everyone inside
You turn on the telly and every other story is tellin’ you somebody died
Sister killed her baby ’cause she couldn’t afford to feed it
And we’re sending people to the moon

But if a night falls and a bomb falls
Will anybody see the dawn?

Is it silly, no?
When a rocket blows up
And everybody still wants to fly
Some say man ain’t happy, truly
Until a man truly dies

Around this time, i was questioning what the concept of God meant to me. Albeit brief, i was also entering a period of misanthropy. There were many factors: seeing so many around me be bullied, as well as being a recipient of bullying myself; seeing how non-human beings were being treated, seeing what seemed like endless war (even then)- and so much more, led me to a form of pessimism regarding humanity. The older i got, the less i engaged in misanthropy; at this point i no longer do. But ‘Praying For Time’ eloquently expressed whatever thoughts and questions that were occurring in my mind at the time.

i go through periods where i listen to it repeatedly. The first song i wrote (after an almost 10-year break) was a song heavily inspired by ‘Praying For Time’ in honor of ‘Buy Nothing Day’, a day i have observed for over two decades.

About the song, George Michael states, “There comes a point where you have to write something which you’d had not written before, and which your interests in any particular topic or subject will inspire you; and that’s why i suppose eventually, most lyricists do approach wider topics than sex and love.”

“And you find that what was over there is over here…”

Hunger, war, criminality, state violence… Those are things that were to be considered ‘over there’- in non-Western areas of the world, and in ‘urban areas’ of the West. We are conditioned to not only compartmentalize calamities as something ‘we’ don’t experience; we’re also conditioned to view ‘giving’ as a competition of sorts. Those who ‘give’ more are viewed as more ‘moral’, regardless of what else they’ve done in life. If “God” has ultimately “stopped keeping score”, then there’s no significant ‘moral compass’ to adhere to; so those who hold the most power create the rules, and we are expected to uncritically follow them.

And charity is a coat you wear twice a year

This is the year of the guilty man
Your television takes a stand

People are beginning to realize that the mechanisms of capitalism which drive poverty and war, and decides what levels of criminality can benefit those who hold the most wealth and resources, have ALWAYS been here.

Despite this fact, there are still some who continue to be in denial, and continue to, again, individualize and moralize issues stemmed from larger systemic injustices- “So you scream from behind your door/Say “what’s mine is mine and not yours”.
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i covered ‘Praying For Time’ (somewhat) on acoustic guitar, around the time of George Michael’s passing in 2016. Listening to it again almost ten years later, i got the idea of covering it again. Usually if i am singing lead for these cover songs i tend to record vocals separately, especially if i’m not in the regular ‘studio’. However, as it was an instantaneous thing, i decided to just go for it and record everything on one microphone.

Before i thought of covering it, as i was listening i was crying a lot. i don’t have the greatest singing voice as it is, and in my cover you hear several flat notes (among other things). Even with all that, i hope i paid respect to what i consider to be one of my favorite songs of all time, in positive ways.

This is just myself and ukulele, and one microphone.

Regarding ‘Shoot The Dog’, Mr. Panayiotou said, ”I wrote it to get people talking, not to change the world and certainly not to cause offense. If it stimulates debate and makes people dance and laugh, I think it will have done its job.”

While he is correct that music itself is not going to change the world; he was one of the few of his stature to make decisive statements in his music about certain political figures… So of course this was going to cause offense, and despite the intent, he was clearly aware that it would.

In response to the ‘offense’, he said (in a 2002 ITV interview with Trevor McDonald), “You know, there’s some very big money possibly being waved around in terms of getting what the people in Fleet Street would consider dirt on me… I was not aware that (the song) would become a mainstream enough thing that we’d be sitting here tonight, but i’m delighted it is, because I wanted to do something to help.”

When asked why he thought he was “equipped to make these points now,” George Michael responded, “Well, I’d say why do you think I’m not? That would be my question.” He mentioned that he sat and watched the news like any other person, but due to his status as a celebrity, he is being told that he needs to shut up and simply entertain. There’s also the expectation, celebrity or not, that you aren’t supposed to have a voice, if you’re not directly involved in the ‘political world’: “And if we’re not supposed to know and not supposed to get involved in the discussion, then that’s why I made the record, you know, because i don’t believe that.” When told that the song is being looked at as a “publicity stunt” due to his “career (not being) what it was,” he responded, “This would be the most stupid publicity stunt anyone ever pulled. I mean, look at the publicity I’ve got out of it. I’m not stupid. i knew I was gonna walk into a wall of criticism because these are very reactionary times, but they’re also very urgent times. And i felt that I had to do this.”

i don’t know if i’d call George Michael a big ‘ol lefty (since i’m not aware of the full scope of his ideological leanings); however, given the scope of his lyrical content, i’d make a safe bet that, if he were still here on earth he’d still be fairly critical regarding the mechanisms of capitalism and imperialism on some level.

What is clear is that he certainly lacked indifference… as did Chumbawamba.

Along the lines of what was said regarding “stimulat(ing) debate and making people dance and laugh,” Chumbawamba said something similar, but much more specific. The cover of Revolution, their 7″ EP released in 1985, stated: “If our music makes you happy, but content, it has failed. If our music entertains, but doesn’t inspire, it has failed. The music’s not a threat. Action that music inspires can be a threat.”
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i don’t remember when it was exactly i first heard Chumbawamba; given that i hung out with Anarchists (and other folks on the left), i was exposed to Revolution and songs from their earlier period, (especially since i loved bands like Crass). i also loved Anarchist (and adjacent) artists, multimedia artists/culture jammers such as The (International) Noise Conspiracy, Emergency Broadcast Network and Negativeland, and Chumbawamba did a split with them called The ABCs Of Anarchism, inspired by the Alexander Berkman book of the same title, and released in 1999.

i feel like i was living under a rock, because i honestly don’t remember much about Tubthumper at the time of its release in 1997. i don’t remember hearing the song (and of course, purchasing the album) until much later. What i do remember was that in the early 2000s i lived with a housemate who was obsessed with both Zounds and Chumbawamba, and she played the Singsong And A Scrap album, repeatedly. Interestingly, i don’t remember if she played much Crass, or early Chumbawamba.

Chumbawamba in many cases, were location and time specific; even with that, there have been certain songs which have surpassed time and space. Aside from ‘Tubthumping’, the only other song i can think of which has reached the public outside of the hardcore fans (and choirs), is ‘Nazi’ (aka ‘On The Day The Nazi Died’), which was released on 1994’s Showbusiness! There were several remixes and reworkings of the song as well. This was another song i was sitting around listening to, then decided i would attempt to cover it.

A sea shanty-type song, it was inspired after the death of Nazi Rudolph Hess, and the commemorations of him which followed. Given that nazism was inspired by many of the laws and tactics done in the U.S. (which was written about in books such as Hitler’s American Model), i changed the lyrics up a bit, as well as updated them to match more recent events.

We’re told that after ’45
The numbers met with dips
But we’ve seen the files for miles and miles
held together with Paperclips

The preferred history they sell
With evidence clear that they lied
‘Cause they continue to come out the woodwork
Even after the Nazis died

They thought the prisoner at Metropolitan
Was a symbol of defeat
But accountability was not met
And so Epstein kept his seat

And his hope of a “superior gene pool”
Would never materialize
Because on the 10th of August in 2019
Was the day the Nazi died

The society’s riddled with gluttons
Eating at humanity
They’re making a tasty meal of all
The petit-bourgeoisie

In spreading their ideology
Behind social media they hide
Which gave people the illusion
That every Nazi died

So if you meet with an historian
I’ll tell you what to say
Tell them that the Nazis
Never ever went away

They’re out there murdering protesters
And peddling racist lies

And we’ll never rest again…
Until every Nazi dies.

This is just lil ‘ol me, acapella style.

The Country’s On Fire… But There’s Always Music

Posted on January 20, 2026 by jamilah

Well… The U.S. has always been on fire in one way of another since its inception, with its constant state-sanctioned violence, class war, enslavement, and all of the trimmings. But of course the conflagration’s becoming more obvious to those who have not been paying attention, either generationally or by choice.

While technically there’s never, ever been a ‘peacetime’ when it comes to the U.S. (for marginalized folks, and anyone who’s been the target of imperialism), music has always been made, either as a means to communicate what is happening, or to bring people a sense of calm as they go to fight the everyday struggles.

This post represents both elements.
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So many people have beloved punk elder Dave Dictor to thank, whenever they chant “No __________, no KKK, no fascist USA” at a protest.

The primary reference point for many in more recent years was Green Day’s performance of ‘Bang Bang’ at the 2016 American Music Awards; however, given the fact that they’re a Bay Area (California) punk band, it’s guaranteed they listen to MDC (Dictor’s long-running band), and most likely saw them at Gilman Street.

Born in Austin, Texas; MDC (which is an acronym for everything from Millions of Dead Cops, Multi-Death Corporations, Millions Of Dead Children, etc.) was one of several amazing bands from the area, such as Dicks, Big Boys, and D.R.I. They did eventually move to the Bay Area, and around this time they also released their first album, Millions of Dead Cops, in 1982. Like many of their peers the album addressed and critiqued capitalism and its many appendages and branches (such as state violence, homophobia, consumerism, racism, corporatism, and more). ‘Born To Die’ (the song where the chant was born) is a classic in the band’s catalog- in fact, the band reworked it in 2016 to add ‘Trump’ instead of the original ‘war’.

(i personally think ‘war’ is more fitting, since every president is a figurehead who ramps up war against the masses, whether that’s internationally or domestically… Yes, including Jimmy Carter. Please study what happened with Indonesia and the people of East Timor, among other things.)

For this cover of ‘Born To Die’, jesse (who is not really into hardcore at all) was kind enough to lend his voice to some gang vocals. Everything else (vocals, percussion, tambourine, cowbell, handclaps, bass, and melodica) is me.

i will be back on the drum kit soon; i’ve just not been in a headspace (or capacity) lately to go down and play a whole setup, even though i still have the desire to create and play music, which i have been doing- i’ve released a couple of EPs over the past few months.

i am hoping you who is reading and listening, enjoy these more ‘stripped down’ covers though.

The next song is from a band i have covered on this site before, despite already knowing i could never do them justice: NoMeansNo. They are one of my favorite ever bands in the whole entire world, and while i in no way have the musical chops to attempt even a quarter of this band’s catalog, i sometimes am up for a good challenge.

Like a majority of the covers i do on this site, i learn them in one to two days. Again, it is a challenge, and it is more for fun than anything else.

‘Joy’ is the opening track from their 1995 album The Worldhood of the World (As Such). It is a song i have wanted to cover for many, many years but never attempted, since (again) i am not a good musician. i have actually only seen one person ever cover it. As a lyrics person i actually don’t mind that the song only utilizes one word, and it truly conveys everything. The song sounds like pure joy, amid the sea of despair, cynicism, depravity and dark comedy of the band’s catalog. Not only is the song one of the greatest openers on a NoMeansNo album; it’s one of the greatest album openers of all time. It also contains one of my top five riffs of all time.

With so much happening in the world (from the hands of U.S. empire), i figured it would be nice to have a bit of a balance… by way of a band from Victoria, B.C. (Canada).

i sing here (obviously)… or yell? i also play percussion, tambourine, handclaps, bass and melodica.

i don’t cover a lot of pop songs on here, mainly for a couple of reasons:

i (again) am not a good musician. i know people consider pop music in general to be vapid and/or derivative; however, the level of musicianship to play it tends to be ignored. While some of the more modern pop songs are built off of samples and/or sound very mechanical, the people who get hired to play as the backing band for the biggest artists are top notch musicians who can play a diverse range of genres.

i am not a good singer. There’s not much else to say about that.

That said, ‘King Of Wishful Thinking’ by Go West is a song i’ve also wanted to cover for many years, but did not for the reasons stated above. i had no idea how i would have approached it. i almost considered trying it on piano, but i already knew it would not have sounded good.

‘King’ most famously made its presence around the world via the soundtrack of the 1990 film, Pretty Woman. Interestingly, i had the soundtrack on cassette when it came out, but i don’t recall anything about the movie, outside of one or two clips i’ve seen. i can’t even recall if i’ve actually seen it outside of those clips. In terms of the soundtrack, i don’t remember much about that either, except for three artists: Roxette, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Go West.

There was something about Go West’s song that was always the most memorable for me though; despite (again) primarily being a lyrics person, i am a sucker for specific chords and layers. Even the drum programming (by Peter Wolf) lacks the sterility of many songs of that era, and in future years. It also could not have hurt that significant players from the Michael Jackson and Earth, Wind & Fire universes participated in the recording: Jerry Hey (trumpet and horn arrangements), David Williams (guitar), Gary Grant (trumpet), Larry Williams (saxophone) and Dorian Holley (background vocals).

Co-writer Peter Cox’ Bill Medley-esque vocals also fascinated me when i first heard them. Go West were pegged solidly in the pop realm overall (particularly given that the main chord structure of the song is not unlike some other UK-based pop songs during that era), but those vocals were definitely giving ‘Blue-eyed soul’.

i was not aware there was a music video for the song up until a few years ago; the surrealist/absurdist ‘everything but the kitchen sink’ theme was a bit off-putting to me (especially when they brought the poor elephant and zebra in), and it immediately reminded me of the nonsensical spectacle that is the video to Michael Jackson’s ‘Liberian Girl’.

But then i began to think again about the concept, as i was working on the cover.

While it most likely was a logistical means of eluding any sort of copyright entanglements regarding the film; thematically, in the end it makes sense. The narrator is literally having a one-sided conversation, in regard to a romantic breakup which does not appear to be amicable- while it appears to lean on the side of the narrator being dumped, there’s no specificity as to whether or not this is the case. The person he’s separated from appeared to be a significant part of his world; and while he recognizes the futility of it all, he’s in sheer denial of the reality of the split. He specifically repeats before and during the chorus that he’s got to fool himself and pretend that the cessation of this particular pairing is one that he’s finally come to terms with. The stoicism he’s displaying on the surface is met with more than a tinge of hope- but deep inside, the shell has already cracked… and what comes out is the absurdity of the facade.

Continually telling yourself something that you yourself do not believe, makes about as much sense as that music video.

For the cover i make an attempt at vocals; i also play melodica, percussion, a salt shaker that a friend made for me, bass, tambourine and handclaps.

And coming full circle (in more ways than one), the final song for this post is another one i immediately fell in love with when i first heard it, but cannot explain why: ‘Coming Clean’ by Green Day.

i was a Green Day appreciator from the Lookout! days, so when they came out with Dookie, i was all over it. In fact, my first and only time seeing them was on the tour for this album- 17 March 1994 (at Irving Plaza), with another Lookout! band, Tilt, opening.

My two favorite Green Day songs of all time are ‘2000 Light Years Away’ from Kerplunk (1992) and ‘Coming Clean’. Do they have better-written songs than those two? Absolutely…. but i do not care.

There is validity to wisdom; however, if one claims to have life entirely figured out, regardless of age, i feel as if this person has ceased to experience life. If you are above ground, there are always experiences and mistakes to learn from.

i am about to be 50 this year, and i’m still figuring out what it means to be a being on this planet. Having experienced a near-fatal accident, i particularly am still figuring out, five years later, what it means to be in this amputee body.

17 though? That was an interesting age. It was when i started my first band. It was also the year after i officially came out to my mother that i was not hetero, and despite our (more than) strained relationship over the years she was supportive, in her own way. i don’t even think i felt any sense of significant relief in my reveal. There was nothing i recall that was celebratory about it. It just felt more as a ‘Why not?’ My guess is that she knew before i even told her, but i could not even tell you if she remembers this moment, as it was fairly uneventful.

When i first heard ‘Coming Clean’ i had no idea it was about Billie Joe Armstrong’s coming to terms with his bisexuality. i connected the song in relation to the general anxiety that comes with the liminal period between the finality of teendom and approaching adulthood. i’ve seen very few interviews with the band over the years (despite listening to the music), so i only found out about the actual meaning around 20 years later, and thus, i followed this knowledge up with a rabbit hole. i’ve seen so few interviews over the years, that i had no idea until recently there was actually Billie Joe and Tré lore. While Lars Ulrich and Kirk Hammett were amusingly (and beautifully) taking the piss at the hypermasculinity and queer-antagonism in the metal and rock scenes via the portmanteau of KLARS; and while they are open allies to queer and trans folks, they both (as far as i know) are heterosexual. i was also familiar with KLARS as it was going on in real time in the 90s, so while Billie Joe and Tré’s antics do remind me of that, at least one (if not both) of the pair is openly queer.

It all ended up making so much sense to me- and it made me love the song even more.

i initially was going to give this cover the full band treatment at some point last year, but as previously mentioned, i haven’t been in the headspace to do it. Speaking of liminal spaces…

About 15 or so years ago i used to play the ukulele all the time; it was always tuned to my favorite key of all time: F#m… at least i think it was.

Given that i still want to play music in some capacity (despite my headspace), i’ve currently been gravitating toward the melodica (obviously), and re-gravitating toward the ukulele. So of course, i did what i had to do, and learned the chords of ‘Coming Clean’ on the ukulele. In the initial version i did (just trying to work out the song), i ended up hearing a bossa nova beat in my head, so i ended up playing it in the way you are hearing it in this recording.

It’s just vocals, a ukulele and the salt shaker.

Thank you for listening… This post is dedicated to anyone out there who needs some positive energy, in the midst of struggle.

Also: Fuck ICE and fuck fascism.

Appreciating Chords (And Melodica)…

Posted on November 3, 2025 by jamilah

This post has helped to confirm even more of what i already knew- i am not the greatest singer. i absolutely love singing (obviously), but i am not great at it. After legitimately hearing people who are tone deaf (some of whom are among my blood relatives), i’ve been doing my best in trying not to say i can’t sing. i mean… anyone who has functional use of a voice box can sing; it’s whether one can sing in a key that is decipherable to the respective song they are singing that is the key. As a giant fan of ‘bad singing’ (where it is my 5th favorite thing in the whole world) though, i don’t mind that.

i think singing, like playing an instrument, is a nice challenge for me. The songs i chose for this post were fairly spontaneous, because i do like the challenge.
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‘Plush’ by Stone Temple Pilots is a song i’ve loved from the moment i heard it. i have no idea when it was the first time i heard it, but it was definitely around the time of the single’s release. In the course of working on this post i remembered that i actually bought a cassette of Core (the album the song derives from) fairly immediately after hearing it- and that is literally all i remember. i obviously heard the rest of the album, but don’t recall any of the songs. ‘Plush’ was the only one that stuck with me. The other thing i remember specifically about the song is that it was incredibly hated by many, as it was seen as a Pearl Jam knockoff. i would not be surprised if Atlantic Records aimed to market them in that way, since the early 90s was an era where the industry attempted to pigeonhole a number of bands with the ‘grunge’ title. While a band like Mudhoney (especially in the 90s) sounded more like a marriage of Captain Beefheart and garage punk, Nirvana’s direct influences were bands like Pixies, Soundgarden seemed to have more prog/metal influences and Pearl Jam had more ‘jam band’ elements; i am not sure what a ‘grunge’ sound actually is.

But STP were not it. They were/are a lot more melodic than the sludginess of whatever the arbiters of consumer culture aim to market as ‘grunge’. And in the course of working on this post, it seems like many have come around to this song, with all of the other covers i have seen.

And i’ve just added to that. So if my cover is bad, i apologize in advance.
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As a person who tends to pay heavy attention to lyrics; in a rare instance, the chords were the first thing that grabbed me about the song. They were some of the most beautiful chords i have ever heard in my life, and as many a player of music says; similar to Stevie Wonder (or Bad Religion) chords, the ones of ‘Plush’ are something i have been trying to chase. The second guitar gives everything this hauntingly beautiful layer (that is missing in most covers, since most of the bands covering it has one guitarist). Robert DeLeo’s bass melodies are incredibly lovely as well.

On writing the riff, DeLeo said simply, “It’s kinda ragtime guitar.” After hearing that it made sense, because jazz (and diminished) chords are some of the most amazing on earth.

In terms of the lyrics though, Scott Weiland (who co-wrote the lyrics with drummer Eric Kretz) “A girl was kidnapped and then later found tragically murdered back in the early part of the ’90s. So it gave me fuel to write the words to this song. However, this song is not about that, really; it’s sort of a metaphor for a lost, obsessive relationship.”

After listening to the song one day, after a mini conversation i said “i’m going to cover this song.” i already knew i was not going to match the greatness of the original, but to be honest, that goes for any song i cover. It’s all in fun anyway, warts and all.
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i’ve been fairly obsessed with playing the melodica. People think of it as a toy, but there’s plenty of things you can do with it. From Jon Batiste to Ena Yoshida to Jon King to bands like New Order and the Smiths… the melodica can be used effectively. Again, like with my singing (or any other instrument) i’m not great at it, but fun is the operative word we should be focused on.

My favorite thing to play on the Suzuki Melodion M-37C though, is ‘Giant Steps’, a song that absolutely changed my life when i was 19 years old, and along with Herbie Hancock’s ‘Maiden Voyage’, contributed to me loving music itself, as opposed to specific bands or artists.

For most of the covers here i played the melodica with some percussion, vocals and bass; i think i added a bit of guitar here as well.

Getting back to the singing; one thing i am understanding more and more is my range. The songs i sang here might be easy for some, but in some ways was challenging for me.

My range is mostly in the ‘folk singer’ mode. i am not a belter at all (which is why you don’t see me covering a lot of songs where that happens, despite me loving a lot of that stuff. i suppose i am more of a belter when i am not being serious, but my actual singing voice, i don’t do very well in that. i am also not much of a screamer, even though i do occasional ‘screaming’, and used to do it a lot more in some bands when i was younger.

(i started thinking about how perhaps i should cover some Suzanne Vega, who’s one of my favorite ever artists. i think i could perhaps handle those kinds of vocals).
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i didn’t want just one song to be a post, but i had no idea what songs i could cover- then randomly, Chris Connelly popped into my head. He’s perhaps known by most as having Ministry and Pigface associations, but his solo works are fairly diverse, and absolutely amazing. He also co-wrote the lyrics to ‘Rapid Fire’ with Meshell Ndegeocello (from the album Weather), one of my favorite artists ever of all time, in the whole world.

Connelly wrote in his book Concrete, Bulletproof, Invisible, and Fried: My Life As A Revolting Cock that “99%” of the folks who were fans of the bands he’s normally associated with (like Ministry or the Revolting Cocks) hated his solo stuff. i do not know how true that is; however, if it is, those folks are missing out on some amazing music. i am glad i actually had an opportunity to see him back in the 90s, when he performed at the Limelight in NYC.

The song i chose for this post is one of my favorite songs of his, ‘No Lesser Of Two Evils’, from what he considers to be the “unfortunately named” Phenobarb Bambalam. He doesn’t seem to be that fond of the album. From what i recall, it was a pretty rough time during the making of this album (for many reasons, including the physical transition of a partner, which inspired the album on some level).

That said, while working on this post i did find out the album was recently reissued on Wax Trax! in 2023, with some extra tracks (plus a lengthy commentary by Connelly). i currently only have it on the original CD, but i used to have it on both cassette and vinyl as well. Anyone not familiar with him might automatically give the vocals some David Bowie comparisons. Actually listening to the music though, would automatically lose the comparison. This man has made so many solo albums and has been in too many bands to count, that to compare him to a singular artist would not be doing justice to the music.

The other thing about this post is that i never realized i’d been singing the lyrics to the song wrong the whole time. i don’t recall the cassette or vinyl having a lyric sheet, and the CD doesn’t have one either. Perhaps the reissue does.

i go to look up lyrics- and they could not be more wrong. Every single lyrics site had the same exact massively incorrect lyrics. i know i have gotten a bunch of the lyrics wrong, but this is too much. The cover i do does the best with whatever information i’ve been given, and what i know are the correct lyrics, despite sill (obviously) getting some of them absolutely incorrect.

The main riff of the piano has some bouncy piano (juxtaposing with the son’s sadness); however, the melodica makes it sound a bit more like the Smiths, or even a bit of Gang Of Four. The other thing that makes this song interesting is that it doesn’t have a traditional chorus.

The other thing that makes me happy is that i finally found a way to fit in the cowbell, which i think is in the original song as well.

If covering Chris Connelly was not on my ‘to do’ list for this blog, neither was the James Gang. i’m technically not as good as anyone in that band… at all.

But again, i am up for a challenge.

Similar to ‘Plush’; i don’t know where i first got exposed to them. i used to buy as much vinyl as i could find (since vinyl was much less expensive than it is now). i think the first records i got were a ‘best of’ compilation, and James Gang Rides again. Both of those had what ended up being two of my favorite James Gang songs- ‘Ashes, The Rain & I’ (from Rides Again– my absolute favorite song of theirs) and the Live In Concert version of ‘Take A Look Around’. i didn’t hear the original Yer’ Album version (which includes a third verse missing from the live version) until a bit later. Both songs have an instrumental coda, which give the songs the intended emotional resonance.

A lot of people point to songs like ‘Funk #49’ or ‘Walk Away’ as being favorites; however, while those songs are great, they have some pretty amazing album cuts, like ‘Things I Could Be’, ‘It’s All The Same’ (both from the Thirds album) and the two featured in this post.

Also similar to Connelly’s song, ‘Take A Look Around’ does not have a traditional chorus.. One of the more interesting things i discovered in the midst of doing these two songs is that they are both in complete juxtaposition to one another: ‘Take A Look Around’ is about not looking to the past and seeking to live a life of now, with joy. The narrator of ‘Ashes, The Rain & I’ is “Living days gone by”.

Speaking of incorrect lyrics; for the longest time i used to think the lyrics of ‘Take A Look Around’ were “Too many words to talk/and no one to hear them” as opposed to “Moments too few”, because again, i only heard the live version for a long time. i still cannot unhear it.

i am also amazed at how many variants James Gang records have. Many people talk about the multiple variants being released today; James Gang records have been repressed/reissued, remastered, released to various countries, and reissued yet again.

With ‘Ashes’, i played only the guitar and bass (with vocals), and ‘Take A Look Around’ was all of the other things previously mentioned.

i had fun doing these (despite any struggles i had along the way). i hope anyone who listens finds some positivity out of them.

Fulfilling Teenage Wishes (Part 1)

Posted on February 27, 2025 by jamilah

i don’t come from a musical family, so i have no idea where it comes from. All i can say is, as long as i remember, whether they actually existed in a song or not i’ve always had harmonies in my head for anything that was on. This of course grew as i began to listen to things outside of what my mother played in the house. Regardless if it was screaming hardcore/punk, folk or R&B, everything got a harmony attached to it.

With that, as i joined a few bands and recorded a solo project or two as a teenager, there were a few songs i had wanted to cover. i had this elaborate plan in my head around how i wanted to go about it, but of course, nothing panned out. Over the years i did do covers (mostly a capella, on ukulele and on piano); however, the particular songs i had longed to do were not among that list- until now.

The way my brain works- If i have a bit of time in my schedule, i will randomly want to create something, whether that’s writing or music. When i was taking a shower- because that’s most likely what happened- the idea arrived that i could actually cover a few of the songs i had wanted to cover since i was a sad/angry teenager who loved harmonies.

One of the songs at the top of that list is ‘Safari’ by the Breeders. A well-beloved song by fans and appreciators, it is the title track from the 1992-released four song EP. Both The Breeders and Pixies (Kim Deal’s band prior to The Breeders) were among some of my earliest musical influences (and you can still hear some of that in music i play today); they also contributed to the development of my massive Steve Albini appreciation.

A direct tribute to Black Sabbath, the video was a apt accompaniment to the seemingly trippy but glorious (no pun intended) layering, with every instrument holding a simultaneous clarity. My favorite part of the song is the ethereal/atmospheric first twenty seconds- i always play this on repeat. Even more favorite is Josephine Wiggs (who rarely if ever gets credited for being the amazing bassist she is) seemingly stopping short, as she realized she wasn’t supposed to keep playing. Whether or not it was intentional, she hits a note that gives everything this perfect touch. Teenage me (who wanted to cover the song) was destined to figure out a way to pay tribute, with whatever limited access to equipment i had.

So here we are, 33 years later… i’m not the greatest ‘musician’ so it’s obviously not as clean or ethereal, but my dream of covering the song has come true. The main difference between the cover and original is that, for some reason, i did not use any toms during the intro/chorus riff; i cannot tell you why. i also added some harmonies, because that is what i do. Because as (the) Buzzcocks once sang, there’s always a harmony in my head.

Released in 1993, Bubble And Scrape by Sebadoh is one i played on repeat in my portable cassette player, among their other albums. A mix of messy punk rock and lovelorn homemade folk, their music satiated a love i had for both noise and beautiful harmonies.

As someone who identified as hopelessly romantic at the time, Lou Barlow’s tales of lost and unrequited love resonated with me, and they balanced perfectly with Eric Gaffney and Jason Lowenstein’s surrealist and intoxication-inspired narratives. ‘Think (Let Tomorrow Bee)’, the album’s penultimate song, was one i played on repeat, as i thought about the hundreds of ways i could tell someone i had feelings for them but was too scared to, because every time i did it always ended in rejection. Because of this, most days i kept my feelings inside, with the songs to keep me company.

As the song is just guitar and vocals it would be much easier to cover, but it’s not something i ever got around to… until now, 32 years later. i had no idea how i was going to approach things, until i sat down at the drums. This then gave me a better (if not full) idea of how i would potentially approach the rest of the song. After this, i added the bass, then some guide vocals. This all helped me to navigate how i would approach the keys. After messing around, what ended happening was something that ended up being completely different from the original, with the intention of it being completely respectful to the sentiment.

i hope i did okay…

BAD RELIGION (part 2): A TRIBUTE TO ALL THE ALBUMS!!!

Posted on January 30, 2024 by jamilah

i have never been a good singer, but i have always loved doing it.

Ever since i was a child, music was always in my system. i wrote my first song when i was 8 years old, and not too soon after that i was co-creating songs with my sister (who was a far better singer than i). The more i began to write and listen to music, the more i became attracted to harmonies and background singing, to the point i thought i wanted to do it professionally… even though i know i would never be hired.

i loved harmonies almost as much as i loved the drums. No matter the song or genre there was always, as the Buzzcocks song states, a harmony in my head (i will not let the irony slip that there’s a certain (popular) Bad Religion song with an uncannily similar bridge/middle 8 riff). It got to the point sometimes where i’d tune out the lead parts.

When Bad Religion came into my life as a teenager, it felt like a wonderland. Despite being an angry punk kid (screaming and ‘singing’ in punk and indie bands), and even as i agree with the sentiment that punk is a type of folk music; i’ve never been an aggressive singer. My vocals would probably fall more in line with a more ‘traditional’ folk sensibility. i always wished i could scream like the greatest hardcore singers, or sing as smooth or effortlessly as Luther Vandross or Phyllis Hyman, but the universe did not deal me that hand. i’m not sure exactly what the universe gave me, but i deal with my limitations in the best ways i can. Like everything else in life.
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Greg Graffin was the first person whose vocals i ever fell in love with (The second person is Mahmoud Ahmed). There are plenty of singers whom i’ve loved (and continue to love) over the years; however, it wasn’t a particular Bad Religion album, but their performance at the Olympic Auditorium in 1984 (which was the Flipside fanzine-released concert that i had a copy of on VHS as a teenager) that grabbed the depths of my heart. It was like, you could be a punk kid and not have to scream. Graffin’s vocals subsequently improved (obviously), but there was something in his vocals on that video that grabbed me- the occasional vibrato, or the penchant for utilizing harmony as a lead voice. There was the simultaneous roughness and vocal fry, with the warmth and musicality not common among his peers. i loved the songs (which is why i got the tape), but i was primarily fixated on the vocals- which is a rare occurrence for me, as i am more of a lyrics person than anything else.

Besides James Hetfield, Graffin is my favorite rock singer, if you can call him that. As a teenager i wasn’t aware of his choir training (or his other musical interests) as a youth, but in retrospect it’s easy to see the approach he utilizes as a vocalist stems from some of that training. When talking about range and dynamics, there tends to be a greater focus on belters or screamers. Very few people i’ve seen cover BR’s songs (including myself) don’t particularly have the range he has.
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In terms of figuring out what songs to do for this post… i couldn’t. It was too difficult. They have too many songs i love, so i decided to pay respect to their whole catalog: yes, including Into The Unknown, an album i absolutely adore. i do not care what Brett Gurewitz or anyone else says- this album is among the top 3 of my favorite BR albums. Not only was it (at least to me) an incredibly sincere response to the increasing violence and machismo in the punk scene, but it also symbolized a lot of what musically inspired them, even if those inspirations were not apparent on their first EP and album (Bad Religion and How Can Hell Be Any Worse?, respectively). The band should not be ashamed at all of that album. The rough production belied the great work that it actually is. It also birthed the trajectory of where the band’s harmonic sensibilities lie.

If the band’s albums collectively sounded consistently like the first one; as much as i love that album, Bad Religion certainly would not be one of my all-time favorite bands. They certainly do have a dependable formula which has contributed to their success (not unlike the Ramones or AC/DC); but as much as they’ve collectively derided the album over the years (Gurewitz in particular), it is the experience of Into The Unknown that led them to the path they decided to trudge, for better or worse. It is possibly with this understanding that they’ve played select songs from the album in more recent years (including a surprise 2021 performance).

Yes, i do have an original copy of this album, and i am very happy. It is an amazing album and no one can tell me otherwise.

While i love the band’s whole catalog (including the (again) second album, as well as all of the Atlantic Records period), i had to be a bit scientific in terms of what songs i chose. i combed through the catalog with the understanding that i could probably sing harmonies to every single one of these songs, but would i be able to sing the lead? What significance or impact do these particular songs have in my life, enough for me to want to do them? Could i make them the least bit interesting?

Like the last post, i decided to arrange many of the songs in F#m (F sharp minor), which was not that easy of a task, especially when utilizing the higher ranges of my voice. The only thing i can say is that i hope i was respectful.

The songs chosen for this medley were:

Anxiety (No Control)
Generator (Generator)
The Voracious March Of Godliness (No Substance)
Time And Disregard (Part III) (Into The Unknown– My favorite song on the album)
Million Days (Into The Unknown)
Only Entertainment (Generator)
The Handshake (Stranger Than Fiction)
What It Is (Stranger Than Fiction)
Pride And The Pallor (The Dissent Of Man)
Individual (Stranger Than Fiction)
God’s Love (The Empire Strikes First)
Recipe For Hate (Recipe For Hate)
The Profane Rights Of Man (The Age Of Unreason)
Pessimistic Lines (Suffer)
Inner Logic (Stranger Than Fiction– This album is probably also in the top 3 of my favorite BR albums, i seem to have done a lot of songs here)
Part II (The Numbers Game) (Suffer)
Kyoto Now! (The Process Of Belief– a top 5 BR song for me)
Don’t Sell Me Short (The New America– This is in the top 3 of my favorite BR songs)
Get Off (Against The Grain)
Nobody Listens (The Gray Race)
Nothing To Dismay (True North)
Old Regime (The Age Of Unreason)
Vanity (True North)
52 Seconds (New Maps Of Hell)

After i compiled the songs and put them in the order i was going to do them, i played drums as a skeleton for the medley (versus the other post, where i did the vocals first). The medley consists of just me playing drums, and doing a bunch of vocals (i’m not as great of a singer as Greg Graffin, but i hope it’s again, respectful to the band and their wonderful albums).

If you are an appreciator of Bad Religion, you perhaps noticed that the medley above contained every album except for the first- and you would be correct, because i decided to do full band covers of a couple of songs.

My favorite song from How Can Hell Be Any Worse? is actually ‘In The Night’, but for this post i decided to cover the classic ‘We’re Only Gonna Die’ (or its alternately named full title, ‘We’re Only Gonna Die (From Our Own Arrogance)’. For some reason i decided to make it extremely fast, so given i’m not that great at guitar as it is, i wasn’t even going to attempt to play it here. Instead, i just layered the track with two basses- one doing ‘regular’ bass duties, and the other plugged into a Big Muff. It also wouldn’t be a proper Bad Religion cover without a tribute to Graffin’s random pointing. i probably didn’t point enough, to be honest. i’m horrible.

(A lot of people talk about the Sublime cover of this song being the quintessential one. i disagree (homeboy)- the best rendition of this song (outside of the original) is the Biohazard cover… and not even that touches the original. Ironically, i played it as fast as the Sublime version.)

We shall round out this post with another top 3 song (and a fan/appreciator favorite), ‘Along The Way’. Considering this song to be “as close as (he) ever got to being religious,” Graffin wrote the lyrics in memory of his dear friend Tommy George. The song is up there with ‘Maureen’, my favorite Sade song. Both songs are simple, yet effective.

Both songs are close to my heart, and remind me of one of my closest friends, Barry Hampton, who physically transitioned in February of 2011. He was my rock in the midst of turbulence. i miss our late night conversations, and his moving through the world with an absence of fear. It’s difficult to develop solid/substantial friendships in this day and age (especially being an amputee), so i cherish every moment. After i recorded the song i said to myself, ‘i should have replaced ‘Tommy’ with ‘Barry”; the sentiment is still the same.

i also kept things to the double-layered bass, drums and vocals, but the Gibson 2019 SG tribute makes the briefest of appearances. i am in no way, shape or form Greg Hetson, so i’m not even going to attempt doing a Hetson-level solo. That said, i wanted to add a tiny bit of something, even if it’s not a mindblowing solo. And besides, it’s a BR cover; and putting the SG somewhere makes sense.

This post is dedicated to Derek and Andreas- i hope i did alright.

And your name here. Of course.

MUDHONEY!!!

Posted on November 24, 2023 by jamilah

i have been wanting to do this post for the past few months; but like i wrote in the last post, life got in the way. To most people who may know or have heard of them, Mudhoney (who is among the top 5 of my favorite bands) may not seem to be a member of the pantheon of punk, but they have definitely inspired me as an angry punk kid. Similar to how David Lovering and Hugo Burnham (of the Pixies and Gang Of Four respectively) inspired my drumming; Mudhoney were the first band to make me want to pick up a guitar as a teenager. i even got a Big Muff pedal back then, to go with my black Peavey stratocaster with the white pick guard. i never achieved guitar greatness back then (and of course, i still haven’t), but i hoped to achieve the modicum of energy displayed within those grooves, and on their Charles Peterson- photographed record covers.

They say to never meet your heroes, but my experience has tended to contradict this saying on a few occasions.

i remember it fairly well- it was June 15, 1995. i was around 18 years old. The band played at Irving Plaza (in NYC) on tour for their album, My Brother The Cow. i was doing a fanzine at the time called The Dissonant Accost, and Julie Cafritz (who i was friends with at the time) introduced me to Steve Turner and Mark Arm, the lead and rhythm guitarists. i ended up interviewing them for the zine, and taking some photos on the stage. i no longer have a physical copy of the zine, but i hold that moment (and the fact that these people i looked up to took the time out to humor a kid like me) in my heart.

i would end up seeing both Mark and Steve whenever i’d visit Seattle from New York (especially when they’d play a show), and also when i ended up moving to the northwest. i’d hang out with Steve (and his cat friend) at his house occasionally when i rolled through town. i eventually lost contact with them (even though, interestingly, Steve and i lived in the same city for a while, and even knew some of the same folks).

i never thought i would ever see or talk to them again; and even if i did i didn’t think they would recognize me, especially since i am now an amputee.

On October 28. 2023 Abby (who shares a similar love for this band as i do, and who i was in my first ever band with) went with me to see Mudhoney (with Hooveriii opening) at Le Poisson Rouge (in NYC). We went to the section reserved for wheelchairs (which is usually a space also reserved for the soundboard and/or instrument cases); Mark Arm was standing next to me, watching the opening band. i tapped him on the shoulder and asked him if he remembered me, and he did! We shared a hug, and i told him my story of getting hit by a truck and losing a leg. i asked Steve the same, and he said he did remember me (as we gave each other a hug), but i have to chuckle as i don’t think he actually remembered me, which is understandable. He did tell me he saw me dancing during the show.

i didn’t even get to tell him that i enjoyed his book, Mud Ride.

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While they were the ones who inspired me to pick up a guitar, the drums are my first love. If i feel like i could never get to the level of Mark or Steve as a player, i can’t even imagine to get near even a quarter of the greatness of Dan Peters. Despite him barely if ever being mentioned on lists of greatest drummers, he is easily on the top 10 for me. The man’s snare rolls are quick and razor sharp. And while they are primarily known for being a guitar-based band, Matt Lukin and Guy Maddison’s bass lay a foundation that would be severely missing if they weren’t there.

Mudhoney are one of those few bands where i currently have all of their albums; that said, there was a time where i owned almost all of their 45s, 12″ non-album cuts, special pressings, etc. as well. While i don’t have most of those records anymore, i did end up buying back the albums years later. Mudhoney get limited to the ‘grunge’ category, but no one band lumped into that category even sounds alike. While i generally enjoy all the bands that tend to be categorized on this level, they and the Melvins are the two bands i did gravitate towards the most. Mudhoney do for all intents and purposes hold a punk ethos creatively (and even in subject matter at times), but they carry on a similar trajectory as Don Van Vliet as much as they do for the Stooges, MC5 and the Sonics, as they are also shaped by the blues in their sound. Their major label period (on Reprise/Warner) seemingly carried on the torch from Captain Beefheart pretty well- as they were picked up in the haze of ‘Nirvana mania’ their music was actively resisting the current. Associated bands like Bloodloss carried this torch even more specifically.

Mudhoney, to me, are one of the last remaining counterculture bands of their generation.

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There were a few songs i played when i regularly played guitar many moons ago (such as ‘Need’); Abby and i also, in our second band (called The Second Day) covered Mudhoney. These days, playing guitar is like starting over, and i haven’t retained much. In a very slow manner i am learning how to play in the ‘traditional’ way; as for now, i pretty much play everything by ear and have developed a particular style of my own (as i know the way i play is far from correct).

Even as i was planning to make this post months ago, i hadn’t thought about what songs i actually wanted to do. As i was playing around for last week’s post i started playing some semblance of a Mudhoney song and thus, further inspiration was born.

(And of course, while i’m not a fan of piling on the pedals i will always have a place for the Big Muff.)

It was incredibly difficult to choose a set of songs to pay tribute to, so i kind of went the ‘random selection’ route. For this post, i will begin with a song from their latest album, the wonderful Plastic Eternity. Continuing the satirical and sneering look at human interaction with modern life (plus a song about the love of little dogs), the album contains antifascist and anti-consumerist anthems. ‘Human Stock Capital’ is one of the few songs i’ve heard that addresses labor exploitation under this most recent pandemic.

One of the things i appreciate about the band’s website is their Emergency Room: The Covid Diaries series. Bassist Guy Maddison is also a Registered Nurse (RN) at a trauma center, and the podcast spoke directly with other Registered Nurses and medical workers who told their stories about life under the roughest waves of the pandemic.

As a person who was considered an ‘essential worker’ in the midst of this rough wave, the song is something that is identifiable. As i survived a traumatic accident, then stayed in the trauma wing of the hospital for two months during the pandemic, i think the podcast is enlightening.

(i am just playing bass for this song; there’s also some graphics included, with some statistics/messaging.)

Coming from the Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge era, ‘You’re Gone’ is one of the original 12″s i kept (before selling a bunch of my collection to move to the west coast; Superfuzz Bigmuff was another original i kept), reminding me of how inflation has also effected record prices- whenever i bought that record, it was only $3.99.

‘You’re Gone’ also ended up being released on the 30th anniversary of Every Good Boy Deserves Fudge, so now i have both of them. The bassline is incredibly fun to play, proving once again how foundational this instrument is.

When i first heard ‘Judgement, Rage, Retribution And Thyme’ (my favorite Mudhoney song of all time, and is a solid example of how the blues also shapes/influences their sound) i thought the riff was reversed, as opposed to being played with a slide. i did play the song with a slide here, but as a tribute to my original thought i actually did play the intro backwards (with a slide), then reversed it.

This sounds nothing like the original (again, i am not a great musician), but this is my humble tribute to a great song. While there are people far superior to me in terms of playing music; i was thinking about it, and to me, the greatest tribute one can do for a band is actually getting up and playing, and being the best you can be in that moment.

(i am playing drums, bass, guitar and vocals here.)

‘Next Mass Extinction’, from an equally crucial chapter of the Mudhoney catalog, Digital Garbage; is for me, a certified headnodder. Never disappointing us with that sardonic wit, it transitions into a psychedelic instrumental jam, rounding it out with the main theme.

The general feeling one would get when listening to a majority of Mudhoney songs is hopelessness, cynicism and pessimism. Within that surface ultimately is a glimmer of optimism. This doesn’t apply to everyone but for many of us, a critique of systems is rooted in the belief that once what oppresses us is uprooted, life will be better for us all.

The band also finds joy in the small things, like dogs. And skating.

From the band’s first full-length (self-titled) album, ‘Running Loaded’ has one of my all-time favorite riffs. i fell in love with it ever since i first heard it- for all i know, it may have been the thing to inspire me to want to pick up that guitar.

But alas, i’m just playing bass here.

And finally, we have another song from My Brother The Cow… except it was on the 45 that came with the vinyl version of the album- the CD (which i also have) has an unlisted track at the end, which is the album backwards save the first two songs, which actually led me to think all those years ago that the opening song was backwards!

‘West Seattle Hardcore’ is part of a set of short songs about bicycle seats, beer and random banter from altered voices and keyboard pings. It’s the kind of thing that will leave someone scratching their head when they imagine Mudhoney to be associated with ‘grunge,’ but something like this is honestly not surprising if you follow their music. It’s also part of the pattern of the (as mentioned earlier) Reprise period specifically, where they made music as beautifully ‘unlistenable’ as possible as they could make it.

i love this band so much.

Of course, being the punk kid that i am, i had to make my cover of the song a little more literal. Mostly inspired by D.R.I. (with bands like Gorilla Biscuits and Reagan Youth for good measure- i mean, i’m from New York… what can i say), i played all the instruments and did the vocals.

i mean nothing but respect. Also, i’m not a musician, so i do what i can.

(This blog post is dedicated to Abby, the biggest Mudhoney appreciator i know- besides myself)

Metallica Fridays (no. 33): Meeting My Fears (no. 8,375)

Posted on May 5, 2023 by jamilah

i once had a tattoo on my left leg that said ‘no fear’, surrounded by balloons.

About 19 years ago i was riding my bicycle (of course), and i had my neck cut by some kite string with balloons attached to it. If you’ve heard any of the stories that came out within the past year about people being injured (or worse) by random kite strings, then you know that kite string is no joke. i am grateful to have survived. As a result, i developed a fear of balloons.

i wanted to lose this fear, and the tattoo was a reminder of encouraging me to do so. As a result of my legs being messed up from being hit by a truck (which i am extremely grateful to have survived as well) i lost this tattoo. Coincidentally (or not) i began developing a whole other heap of fears. While it may be true that fear is simply representative of False Evidence Appearing Real; but suddenly becoming an amputee will probably do that to you on some level.

So now i have to start over and find my voice again.

As i’ve mentioned various times, Metallica has been a major soundtrack in this journey of starting over. The context of their music is quite different now, as a nearing 50 disabled adult whose life experience has now shifted, versus a young kid who was much more mobile with two legs. While my brain struggles to process various things (due to the accident i suppose), my brain is still functioning with dozens and dozens of thoughts and ideas all at once, and it’s frustrating that i can’t get them all out. i usually have something nearby where i can record my ideas (whether it’s paper or a recording device)- and a lot of times those ideas happen when i don’t have access to something, like i’m in the bathroom/shower, or if i’m in bed and don’t feel like getting up to get said things to record on.

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This 72 Seasons album has been incredibly helpful in terms of helping me access some of this creativity. It’s also been helpful in acknowledging that i still have a few fears i was unaware were still around.

This may be a pretty common fear- and it may sound strange to some folks that it’s one i have, given the amount of things i do on here- but one of the fears i do have is a fear of truly accessing my own creativity. i am not a great musician or singer, and i don’t particularly like the sound of my own voice; however, i love creating, so i do it. Creating is a means of survival. i create, but i’m always seeing something in it that makes me recoil, like i played a note weird, or that i’m not good enough.

And suddenly, the universe brings a wonderful song to us called ‘Room Of Mirrors’, the penultimate track on 72 Seasons. To me, ‘Room Of Mirrors’ works similar to ‘Purify’ (the penultimate track on the wonderful St. Anger), in that they both describe the process of truly opening yourself to be vulnerable to others, and breaking down every cell, every atom. To truly open yourself to others is one of the most difficult things to do. Even the most encouraging words sometimes sound like a criticism, either due to painful experiences that have shaped your life, or the voices inside your head telling you ‘no’.

In a mirrored room
Talking to myself
And the voices pushing back
I’ll let them inside my heart
But they’ll tear it all apart

In a mirrored room
Just a simple man
Naked, broken, beat, and scarred
What do I really know?
That fear of letting go

Letting go is scary. Your thoughts are going 250 miles a minute, and you write and record all of these ideas when you can (to the point where it’s even difficult to remember where you put them). You are blanketed by all of these ideas, but to actually put them out into the world is taking that blanket off, leaving you cold. But you need to get up and jog through the forest of your brain to keep warm.

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…And so it began, where we were sitting in the theater listening to the tracks of the album, in the global premiere. There were already songs i was familiar with (due to them being released as singles previously). With the new songs, i closed my eyes for much of it, and just took in the music. Not only is every single song a lyrical deep exploration (charting some of James Hetfield’s best), but so many of the songs are dripping in rich harmony… especially a song like ‘Room Of Mirrors’. As i sat in the theater, my brain immediately went there, with both James’ vocal melodies, as well as the guitars.

Over the course of this week i was messing around on the guitar, practicing one half of the guitarmony on the bridge of ‘Room Of Mirrors’, and a cover began to develop. As i mentioned earlier, i’m not the greatest musician, so a lot of times when i cover a song i do it either from memory, or inspired from portions of the source. i can only play to my own limitations, so i’m not going to play a song similar in style to Metallica, as i’m not great at palm muting, barre chords, pinch harmonics… or even guitar in general.

The foundation of this cover was actually the vocals. After i did those, i did drums, then bass, then guitars. The original song reminded me a bit of Bad Religion (one of my favorite punk bands of all time), which may be what truly endeared me to the song (beside its wonderful lyrics). When i began developing the cover, i kind of heard a ska punk rhythm in my head, mixed with the B52s. i cannot tell you why. i also am horrible at soloing, so i didn’t even attempt to for this song. The song stays pretty much in the solid ‘pop punk’ (?) realm, i guess, with some vocal harmonies- again, which i’m not great at. But…

…i am doing my best to face my fears. i am holding that mirror up to what scares me. That said, i am a survivor of things more scary than my terrible vocals.

INXS!!!

Posted on May 24, 2022 by jamilah

If you’ve read anything on this site (hopefully you do read the posts!) you already know i’m not a huge fan of pop music in general. i’m not referring to music that is popular- that would make little sense, since my favorite artist is Michael Jackson. i also make Metallica-related posts every week. i could be wrong; it just seems to me that the genre of ‘pop’ tends to not particularly take risks. A particular artist could be quite good. However, if said artist is deemed ‘the one’, the industry attempts to oversell that particular sound.

There was a time though, when ‘pop music’ took more risks with their catchy hooks, thereby making radio more diverse than it certainly is today. Australia-based INXS was one of those bands.

Initially, their influences stylistically appeared to be ska, post punk and ‘pub punk’ bands and artists like XTC, Ian Dury and Lena Lovich (and other bands on Stiff Records); and so-called ‘new wave’. They were also coming of age artistically with (the also located in Australia) Nick Cave. Like many bands, they shifted musically into a more ‘pop’ territory. While for all intents and purposes they were still a rock band; and while you in some ways heard some of their original inspirations pop in once in a while, they began to pick up more cues from classic soul and R&B.

While songs like ‘Need You Tonight’ crossed over into the hood, the first INXS song i ever heard was two years earlier: ‘This Time’ (from 1985’s Listen Like Thieves). i remember liking the song, but it wasn’t until a few years later as an early teenager when i became totally obsessed with them.

Yup. i was a burgeoning punk kid, and i was absolutely in love with INXS.

Despite being ‘rock stars’ they didn’t seem that way to me… even with Michael Hutchence as the front man. Yeah, he totally played up the ‘sex symbol’ thing… but they all just seemed like awkward, regular dudes to me. They were huge, but they weren’t bombastic. They played anthems, but they weren’t anthemic.

And they crafted some massively good songs, but didn’t take themselves too seriously.

My favorite INXS song of all time is ‘Horizons’; it became my favorite song of theirs from the moment i heard it years ago on cassette. It’s the first time i recognized a song being written in the way that was written. You could randomly pick a song out of their catalog, and chances are you will like it: ‘Don’t Change’, ‘Communications’, ‘Shine Like it Does’, ‘In Vain’, ‘The Stairs’, ‘Johnson’s Aeroplane’… It was really difficult to choose which songs to do for this post. While their ‘hits are just as great i definitely wanted to focus on their lesser-known songs for the most part.

Like (Minneapolis’) Mint Condition, INXS were a pretty self-contained band. Consisting of Garry Gary Beers (one of the greatest bass players- ever. Both he and Graham Maby are severely underrated), Andrew Farriss (primary songwriter/composer and keys/guitar), Kirk Pengilly (guitar and saxophone), Michael Hutchence (vocals and lyrics- and fan of Anthrax!), Jon Farriss (drums) and Tim Farriss (guitar); for 20 years (until the physical departure of Hutchence), all original founding members were together, since their birth in 1977- originally called the Farriss Brothers.

To begin this musical trip through INXS world, we’ll begin with their first single, released in 1980: ‘Simple Simon’/’We Are the Vegetables’. The clear punk influences are there. Anyone familiar with their later material might find this to be surprising. Of course, the burgeoning punk kid in me was VERRRRY pleased to hear this.

‘Guns In The Sky’ (from 1987’s Kick) is to me, one of the greatest album openers of all time. A response to the Reagan Administration’s Strategic Defense Initiative, the music video (which exists despite it not being a single) flashed ‘SDI’ randomly on the screen. The song is a rightful critique of the u.s. government’s allocation of resources to everything but what it should be going to- which is, assuring the masses’ basic material needs are met.

The drum in the original song is built around a Roland 707; i used the Alessis (and not the Octapad) for this one, so (obviously) the drums are not as booming. i did keep Hutchence’s vocals (because i can’t sing like that!), and played guitar and bass, in addition to the drums. It sounded more like a garage version than the (again) booming anthem it is (smiles).

‘What Would You Do’ (from Underneath The Colours) is another one of my absolute top favorites from the band. In the pocket for the most part, it’s got one of my favorite bass lines in an INXS song. i also love the nod to ‘Stay Young’ (also on the album) as well.

We will take a detour back to the band’s first (self-titled) album, with ‘Jumping’, another one of my favorites. This song is perfect- the bouncy bass, the horn accents (why don’t pop bands have horns anymore??!!), the touch of two tone ska, the guitar being utilized in the verse as a melody with Hutchence’s vocals, the spacey keys, the half-time drums… i love this era of music, with its the post punk disco and ska influences.

Finally, we have a song which is perhaps one of their most beloved- ‘Mystify’. i woke up with this song in my head, so after i got up i started singing it- i wanted to do it just a capella, but it didn’t feel right. i started messing around on the piano, and that didn’t feel right either. Something else was going on in my head. i started messing around on the bass, and i started hearing a beat in my head. It ended up being a sludge rock-influenced half time ditty (with a tiny, tiny bit of tiny tiny discordance (smiles)), as opposed to the bounciness of the original.

i know i’m not that great of a singer- but i do it anyway. i like to sing. Not being that great at singing is a nice feeling, when you’ve survived being hit by a truck.

Metallica Fridays (no. 13): Still Making Sense Of Death And Anger

Posted on April 23, 2022 by jamilah

Much of the time, the songs i choose for each week’s Metallica posts have a lot to do with where i’m at mentally at that time, or if the songs are relative to a particular experience. There are also plenty of times i wake up with random songs of theirs in my head.

The morning of making music for this post i woke up earlier than usual, with not only ‘Invisible Kid’ in my brain, but a particular arrangement of it in my head. i couldn’t go back to sleep, so i got out the guitar and began playing what was in my head, over and over… The tiredness hit me, so i went back to bed.

As the day went on, the song shifted into a whole other energy. i decided to use the drums as the foundation, and work around that. The energy of the end result actually ended up sounding more similar to Joy Division or The Cure than what i played in the morning.

The journey of songwriting…

i tried to sing the song in the original key (which is what i initially played on guitar). But that was painful to hear. i’m already not that great of a singer (but i do it anyway). So i guess i’m an alto or a contralto or something? i have no idea.

If you’ve been paying attention, you know that i am a St. Anger fanboi. i appreciate it not only for its representation of a band struggling to find peace with itself in some way- creatively, mentally and spiritually; it’s also an album in which the subject matter is heavily identifiable to me. The album is an experience in catharsis.

i was that ‘invisible kid’ growing up. i was the shy, quiet kid that kept a lot of things inside, until they sometimes boiled over. Like a lot of kids in this predicament i had friends and hung out, and hid a lot of my feelings- until, again, they sometimes boiled over. i wanted love, but didn’t necessarily know how to receive it. Sometimes i’ve pushed people away by showing love in overwhelming ways. i can talk extensively and excitedly about particular things; however, to this day, when people ask me how i’m feeling i struggle with that, and don’t always know how to answer… so i am most likely to give short answers. i always need to be checking in with people, but sometimes the simplest questions seem intrusive, even when they’re not.

The push/pull the invisible kid experiences is very real… “I’m OK, just go away… but please don’t stray too far.”

(All instruments and vocals are by me.)

A few times in 2006 (in the midst of working on Death Magnetic), the band did live performances of ‘The New Song’ (aka ‘Death Is Not The End’). Of course, the various riffs heard in this working version ended up being portions of various songs officially released on the upcoming album, released in 2008- most notably, ‘All Nightmare Long’ and ‘End Of The Line’. It’s always exciting to see them perform new, unfinished and rare material.

Double kick is all over this song (what’s new?); and of course i only have one foot, so i had to work with what i got. People also might look at this song as not being the most difficult to play (and it’s definitely not the most difficult in their repertoire); however, it’s got that ‘Lars timing’ all over it. There’s a number of parts you have to remember.

i love the songs this working title developed into. i also love this unfinished version. Metallica’s songs speak an awful lot about death, but it’s not always about physical death. i didn’t think about it a lot prior to the accident. After it happened , their music helped me make sense of a lot that was going on, and helped in learning to truly make sense of death- of relationships, of particular feelings… of a leg.

Death really is not the end. Death must occur to give birth to a whole new consciousness.

‘The Unnamed Feeling’ is a tough one for me. The lyrics describe every single thing i’ve been through at various periods in my life.

i hate living with depression. i love myself and am grateful for life, but sometimes my brain just snaps and i either desire to, or attempt to end it all. i hate it. i don’t wish this on anyone.

i can’t convince people to love St. Anger as much as i do; i understand why people sincerely do hate it. But the album is a very healing one for me.

(Interestingly, the camera decided to fall during this song. i kept it anyway.)

SST!

Posted on April 13, 2022 by jamilah

One of my favorite record labels coming up as a punk kid was SST, founded by Greg Ginn in 1978 (i definitely have my criticisms for Ginn, but one thing that is definitely a positive is that he loves cats). From Bad Brains (the greatest punk/hardcore band of all time), fIREHOSE, Hüsker Dü, Dinosaur Jr., Saccharine Trust, Negativeland, Screaming Trees, Sonic Youth, Soundgarden to so much more; the label had a variety of sounds, from straight up hardcore punk and reggae, to jazz-inspired and ‘avant garde’ rock, to country.

For this post i figured i would pay tribute to the label who inspired many a kid like me, and who sprouted more than a few bands who ended up being loved by many.

i’m gonna start with The Minutemen, one of my favorite bands of all time. i suppose you could technically file them under ‘punk’, but they were so much more than that. Like many other great bands they were heavily influenced by jazz, funk, ‘classic rock’ and a range of other styles. Mike Watt is one of the greatest bassists of all time (and happens to be criminally underrated), and ‘Joe McCarthy’s Ghost’ (the song i play here) is seen by appreciators of the band to be one of his greatest bass lines.

The Minutemen’s catalog is full of love songs to the people’s class, heavily and consistently critiquing capitalism, neoliberalism, fascism, and imperialism- so it’s a given as to why they are one of my favorite bands. The band ended upon the physical death of D. Boon (due to a car accident) in 1985.

i am not as good of a musician as George Hurley (drums), D. Boon (guitar/vocals) or Mike Watt (bass/vocals), but i hope this updated ‘2022’ remix/rework of ‘Joe McCarthy’s Ghost’ is respectful to the legacy of The Minutemen.

One of my favorite albums ever released on the SST label is the Meat Puppets’ Up On The Sun. They are one of those bands who, like many metal and punk bands, started out a bit more ‘noise/hardcore’ oriented, then by the next album started adding elements of the things they would be more known for (think Kill ‘Em All to Ride The Lightning). You definitely hear early on what they would come to be; however, in general, the first (self-titled) album (or their EP In A Car) sounds fairly different from the second album, Meat Puppets II, and NOTHING like the third album, Up On The Sun. If you know me well enough, you know i love me some early Meat Puppets. That said, i am a sucker for some wonderful melodies. From Up On The Sun on, that’s what they did.

i may actually post some more Meat Puppets stuff at some point; as for now, here’s me playing drums to ‘Seal Whales’, a pretty chill instrumental.

(The photo at the beginning, while beautiful, is not real. It’s a digital creation by Elena Vizerskaya. Fur seals are in the southern part of the world, and Beluga whales are in the north. Also… sadly, seals and whales aren’t exactly friends. To me, seals and whales are both beautiful.)

The first piece of vinyl i ever purchased (at the age of 15) was catalog no. SST 003- Black Flag’s Jealous Again, the six and a half-minute ep. The rest is history.

Here, i play to one of the songs from that ep (where Ron Reyes was on vocals), ‘Revenge’, as well as ‘Police Story’ from the Henry Rollins-era Damaged album.

Robo (que tocó la batería en esos dos discos) es uno de los mejores bateristas del hardcore/punk.

Now we have another great SST release (017 to be exact), Kill From The Heart by Austin, Texas’ own The Dicks. Staunchly anticapitalist/antiracist/antifascist and pro-LGBTQ+ (Gary Floyd had no problem battling anyone who opposed his existence as a gay man), The Dicks had the kind of energy i wish bands still had. They understood that where you stood mattered, because, even though people love to claim punk and metal is for outsiders, regardless of ethnicity, orientation, etc.; the fact that Floyd had to fight people at shows proves this is not always the case. The fact that folks who are not European still get told they don’t belong in these scenes prove this is not the case. The fact that people who aren’t dudes are more scrutinized for playing ‘heavy’ music shows this isn’t always the case.

As a person who fills out some of the checks on this list, it’s important for me to know what position a band takes on particular issues.

Also, The Dicks had no problem being associated with the sickle and hammer, in one way or another (just as The Minutemen wrote a song literally called ‘Sickles And Hammers’).

Word. Also, The Dicks have a love song to Marilyn Buck. Therefore i love The Dicks.

From Kill From The Heart we bring you ‘Anti-Klan’ (pt. 1), and ‘No Nazi’s Friend’. Something tells me that David Yow (of the Jesus Lizard) was massively inspired by Gary Floyd.

And finally, we have a different kind of SST- a little nod to ‘Sade’s Sweetest Taboo’ (or Sea Surface Temperature?), by Prince Rogers Nelson.

i am gonna be honest. When i first saw the cover of SST years ago, the punk kid in me was scratching my head. ‘Is Prince gonna do some punk? Look out now!!!’ But no… the song is in regards to the devastation that occurred after Hurricane Katrina on August 29, 2005 (interestingly, that was Michael Jackson’s 47th solar return). The song is part gospel, part social commentary; not uncommon in Prince’s 35+ album catalog. ‘S.S.T.’ was released specifically to raise money to help those reeling from the disaster. All proceeds went to the Baton Rouge Area Foundation’s Hurricane Katrina Displaced Residents Fund.

i was messing around, and felt the song sounded pretty good in half-time, so that’s what i did here.

PROSTHETICS AND DRUMSTICKS UNITE!

a journey of a one-legged drummer

Category Archives: vocals

Instant Inspiration…

The Country’s On Fire… But There’s Always Music

Appreciating Chords (And Melodica)…

Fulfilling Teenage Wishes (Part 1)

BAD RELIGION (part 2): A TRIBUTE TO ALL THE ALBUMS!!!

MUDHONEY!!!

Metallica Fridays (no. 33): Meeting My Fears (no. 8,375)

INXS!!!

Metallica Fridays (no. 13): Still Making Sense Of Death And Anger

SST!